The Cowfish (Universal Orlando Citywalk)

So, let’s talk about the Cowfish.

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What is the Cowfish, you ask? Well. besides being an actual fish, it is a restaurant. The Cowfish is a semi-chain, if you will… there are three locations, the most recent being within the Citywalk at Universal Studios Orlando. Last month I was able to check it out for myself, and I was not disappointed.

DSC07986Now you may be asking, what’s so special about the Cowfish? Well, to put it simply, the Cowfish is a japanese/western fusion restaurant.  Namely, sushi/burger fusion, though there is far more to it than that. The restaurant has a unique vibe to it, having a bit of a pop/modern design. But fuck that, we’re here for the food. Let’s have a look!
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Now, I attended the Cowfish alone. As fat as I am, I have a surprisingly small appetite. So I kept things relatively simple; as an appetizer, I got myself some kappa maki, a.k.a. cucumber rolls. They were as good as any other, but I regret not ordering something more adventurous. Whatever, this post is all about the main course:

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Contain your orgasms. This is the High Class Hillbilly – Southern Style Bar-B-Q-Shi. What is that, you ask? Well, it is pulled pork, caramelized onion, and rice wrapped in potato and flash fried. Furthermore, it’s topped with bacon cole slaw, chives, and an appointment with a heart surgeon.

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Bar-B-Q-Shi sans Coleslaw.

Honestly, I’m not a huge fan of Barbecue, or barbecue sauce. For whatever reason, it tends to make me nauseous. But this was DELICIOUS. Seriously. Even the cole slaw, which is usually kryptonite for me, added to the flavor.

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I wish I had more to say, really. As I went alone with not much of an appetite, I can really only speak for the Bar-B-Q-Shi. But the Cowfish has been getting rave reviews, and I can see why. If you’re planning a vacation to Orlando, or you live there, I highly suggest you take a trip to the Cowfish. Shit’s delicious.

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NECA NES Batman Figure

Back in 2013, toy company NECA took everyone by surprise by making a Comic-Con exclusive Jason Voorhees figure… based on the notorious LJN NES game.

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The NES Jason proved to be a surprising success, spurring NECA to make other video game-based figures… including an NES Freddy and a Robocop vs Terminator wave (both games I have covered before).

And then… this.

Beautiful.

Beautiful.

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First Loot Crate!

I finally got around to signing up for Loot Crate. If you’ve never heard of it, basically it’s a subscription service where each month, you’re sent a box full of all kinds of geek goodies. Figured I’d do an unboxing video, so enjoy!

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Dancing Groot

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Fucking finally.

Like most people, I absolutely loved Guardians of the Galaxy. It easily places in my top 3 Marvel films, and I know I’m not alone on that… Guardians of the Galaxy completely defied everyone’s expectations and turned the little-known Marvel team into household names practically overnight.

So I assume you’ve already seen the film, but if not, mild spoiler warning: the film ends with baby Groot dancing to “I Want You Back” by the Jackson 5. It’s adorable, and pretty much everyone had the same thought: “I WANT A TOY OF THAT”. Well, it’s been a few months, but it’s finally happened. Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you… Dancing Groot.

It’s sublime. Though he’s not particularly animated, it’s more than enough for me… I mean, this is baby Groot. He could have been a completely static figure and I still would have caved in and bought him. Of course, he dances to “I Want You Back”… for it to be anything else would be sacrilege.

DSC07885Though the sculpt’s fairly simple, the likeness is pretty spot-on. Groot’s cute as ever, and he fucking knows it. As you may expect, he’s made of a soft rubber with a rotating metal rod inside.

And he’s not limited to the Jackson 5 either. Groot will dance to any music you have on hand, from Kanye to Motley Crue. If for some reason you needed more to justify your purchase, there you go.

Unsurprisingly, these guys are selling pretty rapidly. So if you manage to get your hands on one, consider yourself lucky! After all, any chance you have to purchase a dancing tree baby you should probably take.

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Stocking Stuffers – Kroner Trigger

Murray Chrombus! This time I take a look at 6 unrelated games. Do they suck? Prob’ly.

 

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Super Smash Bros. for Wii U

As I’m sure you all know, last Friday marked the launch of Super Smash Bros. for Wii U. If you have yet to play it, I’m assuming you either don’t live in the US, don’t have a Wii U, or are in fact some sort of sentient sludge.

2557931-1628296571-25282So how is it? Well, it kicks ass, as I’m sure is no big surprise. If you’ve already played the 3DS version, you have at least some idea of what to expect… but undeniably, the Wii U version is the superior game.

IMG_0475The 3DS version is great too, of course, but it had its share of flaws… first and foremost being the controls. Now, I honestly didn’t have too much of an issue with the 3DS controls. Indeed, many of the oft-reported gameplay issues with the 3DS version, such as the small screen making it hard to follow, I never had an issue with. However, within the first few minutes of playing the 3DS version with the familiar Gamecube controllers, I was amazed by just how tight everything felt. Every movement just seemed so much more precise. Unlike Brawl, where you slid all over the place like a greased pig, the new game just feels like you’re in complete control of your character.

IMG_0469Smash Bros. for Wii U offers a ton of content for both single and multiplayer, even more than the 3DS version. It’s a bit disappointing to see the lack of a story mode, but apparently I was the only person who liked Subspace Emissary so it’s understandable. Also, compared to the 3DS version, the layout is much cleaner, though it can still get a bit convoluted. Why Smash Tour gets its own button while Classic, All-Star, and other modes are awkwardly tucked away in “Games & More”, I have no idea.

IMG_0476Speaking of which, Smash Tour is essentially this game’s replacement for the 3DS’ Smash Run. It’s a boardgame of sorts, where you go around the board collecting powerups and fighters, battling eachother along the way, before finally competing in a final battle with whatever fighters you happened to pick up. It’s… weird, and really only fun if you have three friends to play it with.

IMG_0477 IMG_0479One of the more underrated aspects of the game is the Mii Fighters. Honestly, I probably play as Miis more than any other character. They can actually be really good, and I’m a sucker for customization in any game. That said, it is rather annoyingly limited. There’s only 6 outfits available for each fighter type, and the weapon is also dependent on that. Want to wear the pirate outfit but wield a claymore sword? Well, fuck you, you’re not allowed. Want to use the steampunk outfit on your swordsman? Nope, that’s only for gunner characters.

IMG_0478You also can’t change the color of anything… your outfit’s color is determined by the Mii’s default clothing color. Meanwhile, the headwear’s color can’t be changed at all. Despite all these limitations, dicking around with Miis is still a lot of fun.

IMG_0481The stage builder also returns from Brawl, and is simultaneously more robust and more limited than it was before. In Brawl, you were limited to flat terrain, barring a few slanted ground pieces… but this time, you can use your Wii U gamepad to draw your own terrain, allowing for hills, rocky landscape, and more. And that’s great. Problem is everything else. There’s actually LESS objects you can place in your stage than in Brawl… all you get are two different sizes of springs, cannons, lava, and moving platforms. That’s it. No falling blocks, no spikes, no ice, nothing but the bare basics. Plus, you’ll STILL hit your limit on objects and terrain extremely quickly.

IMG_0482Even the ability to draw terrain is insanely finicky. Making grabbable ledges is incredibly frustrating, as often the game will just not register it as a ledge, no matter how careful you’re being. You can use a grid mode to make straight lines easier, but even that just seems to do whatever the hell it wants most of the time. See how things look a bit uneven up there? Yeah, I used the grid mode for that. Also, more often than not, the CPU can’t understand anything besides the most basic of stages, and will often run pointlessly against walls, throw themselves into hazards, and other such stupidity. The mode’s still fun, but damn.

IMG_0484I’ve barely scratched the surface on what Smash has to offer, though… otherwise, I’d be doing this all day. Flaws aside, this is easily the best Smash yet. From a gameplay perspective, everything feels just right, and the huge amount of content ensures that the game will keep you busy for quite some time.

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Mr. Bones – Kroner Trigger


Happy Halloween, everybody! Enjoy this extra-spooky new episode of Kroner Trigger.

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